Not necessarily the best picture of us all, but we were all there and that's what matters.
6 years ago today I had just gotten home from a doctors appointment and I was getting ready to go to work when I got the call. Kenny was gone. He'd passed away the day before and his roommate found him. It seemed like such a bad joke, only it wasn't. The days and months follow his passing were so hard and we still miss him terribly. He would come and babysit for us sometimes and he loved Parker so much. It was really fun to see him as an uncle. Parker was just a year old at the time so he doesn't remember Kenny, but we talk about him a lot and show the kids pictures so they can know just how great he was and how much we all love him.
Kenny was a lot of fun. He was full of energy and could be really sweet when he wanted to be. I have a lot of special memories of Kenny and am grateful for the time we had together. The summer we moved to Utah, when Parker was about 6 months old, Kenny and I went to Lagoon together and spent the whole day. I'll always remember how special it was to have that time with him and the fun that we had.
This is at his grave on April 23rd, what should have been his 26th birthday.
And who knew that just 6 short years later we would be here again to say goodbye to another beloved family member. Has it really been over 2 months now? There have been so many times when I think of something that has happened or something fun the kids did and I pick up the phone to call you Dad and tell you about it. Sometimes I even get so far as to dial all the numbers. And I get the recording that the number isn't in service anymore and I am reminded that so much more is gone than just a phone number. I miss you so much, sometimes the pain of your loss makes me just want to run and hide until everything is back to how it was. But I know I can't. And as happy as I am that you and Kenny are together now, I would so much rather have you here with us. I'm holding on with all the faith that I have that we will be together again one day. But until then, I miss you, and I love you more than words can ever say.
3 comments:
Oh, Kerry.
But you can be sure, you can be certain, that your boys are deeply proud of you and the life you are living. Love. Love names us and binds us. And you are swimming in it.
By the way, Ginna loves you, too. Very much.
I didn't know that you had lost a brother too. I am sorry for both of your losses. I can't imagine how painful it must be to lose 2 close family members. It's things like this that make you realize what a wonderful and powerful blessing it is that we can all be together again with those we've lost.
Gosh I hardly know what to say about this post. Who ever knows what's going to happen in life and who ever would've thought it would've been all of this. So much good and so much sorrow.
It definitely does make me feel so much less naiive about life and the things that happen--that's good and bad I guess.
I miss them both and I can only imagine how much deeper it must be for you.
Love you, glad we can all be here for each other.
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